motivation

a little adrenaline will do wonders for a morning jog, as i found out this morning. i was out early this morning for a pleasant jaunt around the neighborhood. i thought it'd be nice to run out to the hospital and then by katie's old house. which i did, and happily i ended up at the hospital by choice instead of necessity. you see, about five minutes in a large, angry, brown dog started chasing me and barking and oozing drool all over my shorts and darting from my left side to my right side and behind me.... i think he was trying to decide where might be best to take a bite. and obviously i was not very pleased about this. then a man in a neon yellowish green shirt, who i think was about to start painting a house, started yelling at me to stop running. he sounded about as angry as the dog, but he was actually being quite nice. i was sort of still processing the fact that i was about to be attacked by a dog, and had forgotten that i was running, though quite aware that i wanted to get away.... and hadn't really gotten to thinking about the best way to deal with the beastly animal. as much as i didn't want to i stopped. and he didn't bite. the man continued to yell at me that i should not run away from dogs, which i will hopefully remember next time. i said, "yeah." he said, " i know it scared the hell out of ya." i said, "yeah." and then he said he'd call the pound. i thanked him and ran on, watching over my shoulder to make sure beastly wasn't following me.

temple escapade

so i went to the new temple yesterday and got to see things like the celestial room, which is sort of like an all-white art deco waiting room gone sacred. and the pool where they baptize the dead, and the three rooms where you can be sealed for all eternity, in marriage, or to your parents... there was more visible security than the president gets, complete with black suits wearing ear pieces monitoring your every thought. i was a little disappointed, though not surprised, that questions were not welcome. i had a few. the guide talked a lot about how beautiful it is, its rich materials (granite from india, maple from africa), how it makes mormons feel exalted and uplifted and prepares them for eternity (though they left out the part about ultimately becoming gods and the part about husbands having to call their wives to heaven on the day of the resurrection, if she was a good enough wife). god almost seemed like an afterthought, though they claim it is for his glory. the whole explanation about the temple's use was rather.... vague and uninformative. it was one of the most organized events i have ever seen, everything was managed and controlled. all smiles. no questions. it creeped me out a little.

what's your favorite beer?

today i was informed that slugs have a favorite frosty beverage. i'm perfectly serious. according to a very reputable source, slugs like beer and prefer budweiser to any other kind of beer. and how would one know this? well, slugs eat plants and plant people don't like that, so they try to devise clever ways of killing them. providing them with a local watering hole seems to do the trick better than just about anything, so there are things manufactured to trap slugs by luring them in with beer where they can literally drown in their sorrows (or happiness, as the case may be). different kinds of beer have been used, but slugs it seems, have a strong preference. give 'em a bud and they flock to their deaths. if it weren't quite so morbid and well, gross, budweiser might have a good advertising opportunity on their hands. i guess the major down side to dealing with your slug problem this way is the smelly, frothy mess you have to deal with when they start collecting and dissolving in your ingenious slug trap filled with beer.

invasion

i'm sitting in a hammock on the porch, getting a little dizzy by the gentle back and forth motion. i was not made for carnival rides. if a hammock makes me a little queasy, just imagine what the spinning tea cups would do. i'll spare you the details of that experience. it wasn't so good. anyway, the breeze feels nice; it's a pleasant 95 degrees or so in the shade. just moments ago my quiet time out on the porch was disrupted by a pack of dogs that came into the yard. sayers perked up, so i looked to see what commotion might be heading our way. ah, a pack of fierce, howling, screaming, sometimes squeaking or screeching chiuauas. four of them. they were tearing around the front yard like they owned the place. i have to say, i think they have strength in numbers, because although one chiuaua barking at you is slightly absurd, you get a whole bunch of them and it's sort of frightening. it's like the birds. i thought about trying to read one of their tags to see where they'd escaped from, but then again i wanted to keep all my fingers intact, so i let them go on their way tearing up the rest of the neighborhood with their display of terrible chiuaua ferocity.